If there's one thing I really get tired of hearing it's the phrase "that's just how he/she is." Another example is the idea of coming to church "just as you are." I totally agree that you don't wait until you're sanctified to start going to church, and church is a place for sinners and saints alike. However, I beg you to come as you are, but don't leave the same. Come broken and tired, but leave closer to Jesus than before. In 1 Corinthians 5 Paul talks about a man who is immoral and the church who is boasting about their acceptance. Acceptance is good, but tolerance won't cut it. Paul is essentially saying that that man knows better and has done nothing to change. Paul's conclusion is that that brother must be left to destruction, so that maybe he will be saved. That's kind of a tough love concept.
Back to the first statement though. "That's just John man..." If you're a Christian, that phrase is a total load. I probably harp on tough love more than is necessary, but bear with me in this. I don't understand the Biblical basis for that phrase. When did Jesus ever challenge a crowd to do something radical and say, "Except you, Ned, I know how you are...You...you just do your best." Not once. He calls all men everywhere to account. I dare you to stand before the thrown on the final day and say, "You gotta understand, Jesus. You know how I was raised. My parents were out of the picture, and..." God won't look at you and agree to let you slide by.
Don't get me wrong, there is a time when upbringing issues are relevant. They are relevant as a baby Christian, and they are relevant as explanations but never excuses. Your behavior can be explained by a poor upbringing, but never excused by a poor upbringing. Jesus understands, but he also calls us to new life.
When you truly give your life to Christ, your past becomes irrelevant. It's not where you come from, but where you are. There are many examples of the old you being gone (Gal 2:20, 5:24; Rom 6; Eph 2:1-3). If you are truly in Christ the old you is dead. That person never existed as far as Christ is concerned. That's crazy hard for us to grasp. But we need to grasp it and start living a redeemed life, not a redeeming one. So when someone says, "Well that's just the way I am," they are discrediting the work of the cross. That is why the excuse doesn't stand. You are being renewed!
If anybody could use their upbringing as an excuse, it would be Paul. He was considered beyond righteous for his persecution of the heretical Christians. He made it to middle-adulthood with the same mindset. He was set in his ways, and ignorant to the truth. Yet, he never once excused himself on the grounds of ignorance or upbringing. He took responsibility for his actions and changed so radically. If we were Paul, we could throw excuses out for every mistake we made. Romans is testimony against our excuses.
We have lost our right to excuses. Take responsibility for your actions. Shoot, let's admit when we are wrong! The challenge for all of us is to root out all the excuses in our lives. That may mean going back in the past to admit wrongs and own up for our mistakes. This isn't easy, but that's the cross. Responsibility is a part of our new life in Christ. Romans 12:2. I love you guys, thank you for reading!
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