I was thinking the other day about sex, which I'm allowed to do, and I found myself thinking "Why is sex outside of marriage a sin?" I get the whole "Do not murder" thing, and stealing, lying, jealousy, anger, etc. I understand those, because they can really hurt other people. But why sex? I realize there are many times sex is harmful to others (and I'll explain that later) but most of the time people have sex they don't consider it a big deal and both people leave all the happier. So why is God such a stickler about sex?
Sex is a metaphor deeply rooted in the Old Testament. Many times, especially in the prophets, God uses adultery as a metaphor for Israel's unfaithfulness to him. Take a look at some of the OT references for "lust" and "adultery" and you will see that they are used literally less times than figuratively. Look at Jeremiah 3, Ezekiel 23, and the whole book of Hosea. Ezekiel 23 gets very graphic (makes my list of naughtiest Scriptures). Hosea is actually told by God to marry a prostitute (Gomer) and take care of her. Several times over, God uses the prophets to convict the Israelites of committing adultery with idols and false gods. Why the awkward metaphor?
I think it's critical that we understand the way God made sex. He invented it along with the creation of humans, and commanded them to do it! Pretty sweet commandment. He made it for procreation, of course, but he also made it the most intimate, connecting bonding of a man and a woman. Intimacy is such a deep neurological bond, and adultery is a violent breaking of that bond. [I tried to find a good link for the psychological connections made by sex, but the websites all contained some kind of awkward picture, so you'll just have to trust me.] I think people who have had meaningful sex can understand what I'm talking about, whether for good or for bad. God, on the physiological and psychological levels, made sex for 1 pair of intimate partners.
To answer the question, I would say that sex outside of marriage is a big deal because of the way God designed sex. Intimacy by definition is not something to be shared with anyone and everyone. God made the gift of sex and he put its boundaries on marriage because that is simply how he designed it. I can't really argue with that.
We all "know" that extramarital sex and homosexual sex is a sin, but I am always hearing questions as to why. Hebrews 13:4, and 1 Corinthians 6:12-7:40 are two very clear commands to remain a virgin until marriage (among many others). I also keep hearing that the law against homosexuality is exclusively an OT thing, but that isn't true either (Romans 1:26-27). God has designed sex for a particular purpose, whether we like it or not. One last caveat, lust for a woman outside of marriage is just as much a sin as a man lusting for a man. Christians get a little to hung up on the homosexual thing, and are much more forgiving of heterosexual lust; both are sins.
The final metaphor for sex that I want to highlight is that of Ephesians 5 and Revelation 21. The ultimate point of sexual intimacy and marital faithfulness is to reflect the love of Jesus for the Church. The prophets wailed about Israel's unfaithfulness and the epistles warn against sexual immorality because God is making a point. Just like he is preparing the bride (the church) for the wedding ceremony of Rev 21, so too he is preparing us for faithfulness with our spouses. Your purity and your marriage are an act of sharing the Gospel. Your purity is a direct reflection of Christ's love for us. So when we fail in sexual immorality, we are damaging the imago dei and the picture of Jesus.
I have said it before, but because of the times we live in, the purity talk is much more a "damage control" talk. Many reading this have probably been unfaithful sexually, and it's far too late to talk about keeping your virginity. But just like God with Israel, and just like Jesus with the unfaithful church, you are continually being re-purified for the wedding banquet. What has God given to us, and we messed up, that he cannot restore? So I encourage you to stay pure, whether that is a continuing action or a new start.
What's the big deal about sex? Purity is an act of evangelism and a prelude to the wedding banquet.
Sex is a metaphor deeply rooted in the Old Testament. Many times, especially in the prophets, God uses adultery as a metaphor for Israel's unfaithfulness to him. Take a look at some of the OT references for "lust" and "adultery" and you will see that they are used literally less times than figuratively. Look at Jeremiah 3, Ezekiel 23, and the whole book of Hosea. Ezekiel 23 gets very graphic (makes my list of naughtiest Scriptures). Hosea is actually told by God to marry a prostitute (Gomer) and take care of her. Several times over, God uses the prophets to convict the Israelites of committing adultery with idols and false gods. Why the awkward metaphor?
I think it's critical that we understand the way God made sex. He invented it along with the creation of humans, and commanded them to do it! Pretty sweet commandment. He made it for procreation, of course, but he also made it the most intimate, connecting bonding of a man and a woman. Intimacy is such a deep neurological bond, and adultery is a violent breaking of that bond. [I tried to find a good link for the psychological connections made by sex, but the websites all contained some kind of awkward picture, so you'll just have to trust me.] I think people who have had meaningful sex can understand what I'm talking about, whether for good or for bad. God, on the physiological and psychological levels, made sex for 1 pair of intimate partners.
To answer the question, I would say that sex outside of marriage is a big deal because of the way God designed sex. Intimacy by definition is not something to be shared with anyone and everyone. God made the gift of sex and he put its boundaries on marriage because that is simply how he designed it. I can't really argue with that.
We all "know" that extramarital sex and homosexual sex is a sin, but I am always hearing questions as to why. Hebrews 13:4, and 1 Corinthians 6:12-7:40 are two very clear commands to remain a virgin until marriage (among many others). I also keep hearing that the law against homosexuality is exclusively an OT thing, but that isn't true either (Romans 1:26-27). God has designed sex for a particular purpose, whether we like it or not. One last caveat, lust for a woman outside of marriage is just as much a sin as a man lusting for a man. Christians get a little to hung up on the homosexual thing, and are much more forgiving of heterosexual lust; both are sins.
The final metaphor for sex that I want to highlight is that of Ephesians 5 and Revelation 21. The ultimate point of sexual intimacy and marital faithfulness is to reflect the love of Jesus for the Church. The prophets wailed about Israel's unfaithfulness and the epistles warn against sexual immorality because God is making a point. Just like he is preparing the bride (the church) for the wedding ceremony of Rev 21, so too he is preparing us for faithfulness with our spouses. Your purity and your marriage are an act of sharing the Gospel. Your purity is a direct reflection of Christ's love for us. So when we fail in sexual immorality, we are damaging the imago dei and the picture of Jesus.
I have said it before, but because of the times we live in, the purity talk is much more a "damage control" talk. Many reading this have probably been unfaithful sexually, and it's far too late to talk about keeping your virginity. But just like God with Israel, and just like Jesus with the unfaithful church, you are continually being re-purified for the wedding banquet. What has God given to us, and we messed up, that he cannot restore? So I encourage you to stay pure, whether that is a continuing action or a new start.
What's the big deal about sex? Purity is an act of evangelism and a prelude to the wedding banquet.
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